7 Things Holding You Back From the Life You Want

1. Your own fear

What you are fearing most does not have power; it is fear itself that has all of the power. Fear is the constant thoughts and feelings that loop around in your brain, making you second-guess yourself. The question is, how long are you going to allow fear to control you? The key to moving on is to accept your fears and face them head on.  Remove the weakening emotions and thoughts that you might have and seize the day.

2. The past

One of the best things that I have learned, especially from being in college for six years, is that you can really improve your life and personal well-being by letting go of what is in the past. We all have those days when we look back on our week and think, “What is in this for me? Why am I doing this?” In reality, this happens more than we’d like. Instead of reflecting or drowning yourself in negative memories, get rid of that cloud of hatred and let yourself BREATHE. Focus on what you want and how you’re going to make that happen.

3. Negative body image

This is always a sore subject, especially going to Cal Poly. We are surrounded by beautiful people 24/7 and it is extremely hard not to compare ourselves to others. But seriously, there is only one person’s opinion you should be concerned with when it comes your body and that is YOU. There is no such thing as a correct body type, as I talk about in “Ending the Thigh Gap.” Be proud of who you are and stay comfortable in your beautiful skin!

4. The idea of a perfect partner

Alright ladies, we’ve reached the age that having a checklist of qualifications for the perfect man or woman has got to go. Go ahead; toss it out the window because you don’t need it anymore. I’m not saying that we shouldn’t have standards when we’re looking for a significant other, but having unrealistic expectations of a relationship is only setting you up for disappointment. Be open to meeting new people. Talk to that cute guy in your class or share a snack with the girl at the library. Find the right person that makes you happy and accepts you for who you are. The sooner you realize that there isn’t the “perfect man” or “perfect woman” out there, the better off you will be.

5. Excuses, excuses and more excuses

We go to Cal Poly and live in one of the most beautiful cities in California. Stop complaining and making excuses. We keep making up excuses for too many things: from working out to not having time to do anything and everything. These rationalizations make us feel better about not doing something that you need/want to be doing, but how long are we going procrastinate? Get up early or skip out on your favorite TV show; start doing what you need to do!

6. Not trying

I’ll make this one simple; Life is what you put into it, so if you are not willing to work hard and put forth the effort, you will most likely end up unhappy. You have the capability to make your life the best it can be, so make it happen.

7. The need to be happy all the time

If we were happy all of the time, imagine how annoying that would be? There would be no real emotion or truth, just over-the-top smiles all around. We all need to feel sadness, defeat and anger. These feelings serve who you are; they teach you a lesson and show you what to care about. Being happy is great and all, but having a full-blown crying session or an intense workout to blow off steam is a great way to express yourself and who you are. Be happy and allow yourself to feel.

“Never confuse a single defeat with a final defeat.”
―F. Scott Fitzgerald

Why Quitting is Actually a Good Thing

Many of us see quitting as a failure, but is it really quitting or are we just moving on?

We’ve grown up with heroes in movies that face it all, never giving up despite how hard things get. Society has given us the expectation that when life gets tough we must fight back and battle on. There’s no denying that we are humans of habit, but when is enough really enough?

There are plenty of things that we do in life that we don’t give ourselves enough credit for. We do things for our friends, teachers, family and employers, but what about ourselves? 

It takes a lot of courage to admit that you’re unhappy with something or that your decisions weren’t the best. However, that is what creates the truth in things that matter. There are paths made for everyone, but when the going gets tough, sometimes there is a new path to be discovered.

Decisions that involve quitting aren’t always going to be easy. But if there is a time when quitting is the right thing to do, do not be afraid to do so because of what others might think. Live courageously and make choices that can have the potential to change your life.

Our time on this Earth may be limited, but there endless paths to travel on. Never waste your time on something that isn’t making you happy or is compromising what is right and wrong. Do not be ashamed because learning from these experiences is what makes us human. This is your life. Don’t fear the stigma of being a “quitter.” Be you and embrace the change.

 “There are things known and there are things unknown, and in between are the doors.” --Aldous Huxley